What the Research Says About Youth Sports Expectations - A Guide for Families
If you hang around youth fields and courts long enough, you’ve probably heard someone say, “Every parent thinks their kid is going D1.” The stereotype is so common that it’s easy to assume most parents are wildly unrealistic.
Recent research paints a more nuanced and more hopeful picture.
A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Florida and Ohio State found that most parents actually hold reasonable expectations about their children's athletic futures and often become more realistic as their children age. But the same study also identified a sizeable minority whose expectations far outpace reality, creating conditions for unhealthy pressure and overspending.
For Brooklyn Speed & Power families, understanding this research can help you check your expectations and build the kind of parent-child relationship that supports both performance and well-being.
What parents really believe about their kids’ futures
The University of Florida–Ohio State study challenges the idea that nearly every sports parent believes they’re raising the next pro. Most parents:
Held moderate, flexible expectations about their child’s sports future.
Adjusted those expectations based on actual performance and their child’s interest.
Valued character, health, and enjoyment alongside any hopes of higher-level
But there is a meaningful subgroup of parents who:
Believe their child is on an elite trajectory, often early in their sports journey.
Invest heavily in travel leagues, private coaching, and year-round specialization.
Make sports decisions driven by dreams of scholarships or pro careers rather than the child’s current needs and interests.
An Aspen Institute survey from Project Play found that about one in ten sports parents believes their child could go pro, and nearly two in ten believe their child could play Division I college sports. Other polling and news reports echo these findings: roughly 1 in 6 parents think their child is “meant” to be a professional athlete.
From a developmental psychology perspective, expectations themselves are not the problem. Decades of research show that higher parental expectations in academics, for example, predict better achievement as long as they are realistic and coupled with warmth and support. The same logic likely applies in sport.
When expectations help, and when they hurt
In our work with Brooklyn Speed & Power families, we see three broad “expectation profiles”:
Supportive realists: These parents believe in their child, encourage effort, and recognize that the goal is growth—whether or not it leads to scholarships. They set high standards for things like commitment and effort but stay flexible about outcomes.
Anxious optimizers: These parents worry about “falling behind” and feel pressure to do everything possible—elite teams, private coaches, constant competition. They may not be chasing the pros, but they are chasing certainty.
Outcome chasers: This smaller group is highly invested in specific outcomes: scholarships, rankings, and social-media recognition. When those outcomes don’t materialize, frustration can spill over into the parent–child relationship.
Research suggests that supportive realism, high but attainable expectations combined with responsiveness to the child’s needs, supports motivation and well-being. On the other hand, unrealistic expectations are linked to:
Overspending and financial strain.
Over-scheduling and year-round play that increase burnout and injury risk.
Increased conflict and anxiety in kids who feel they’re always “failing” to measure up.
From a child-psychology viewpoint, what matters most is whether a child feels seen as a whole person, not just an athlete, and whether love and approval feel contingent on performance.
How expectations show up in everyday Brooklyn life
For many Brooklyn parents, expectations are less about fame and more about opportunity:
“If they can get a scholarship, maybe college will be more affordable.”
“Sports kept me out of trouble; I want that for my kid.”
“I didn’t have these opportunities growing up; I don’t want them to miss out.”
Those intentions are admirable. However, when we take a broader perspective, the statistics are disheartening: According to NCAA data and various explanatory articles, only a small percentage of high school athletes continue their education in college, and an even smaller percentage receive athletic scholarships. Meanwhile, the psychological and physical benefits of sports, better health, social skills, and lower risk of depression are available to almost any child who stays engaged.
So the central question shifts from “How do we get to D1?” to “How do we use sport as a tool to build a strong, healthy, resilient kid who could play at the next level if they choose to?”
A framework for healthy expectations
At Brooklyn Speed & Power, we encourage families to organize their expectations around three time horizons:
This season (short-term)
Focus on skill development, enjoyment, consistent effort, and learning to be coached.
Questions to ask your child: “What feels more fun now than it did last season?” “What are you proud of improving?”
The next 3–5 years (medium-term)
Focus on healthy habits, multi-event exposure, resilience, and social connections.
Questions to ask yourself: “Is my child learning to handle setbacks?” “Are they discovering what they enjoy most in sport?”
Adulthood (long-term)
Focus on lifelong physical activity, confidence, and mental health.
Questions to ask: “Am I making decisions that serve my child’s wellbeing at 25, not just their performance at 15?”
This lines up with research showing that continuous participation in youth sports (vs. quitting early) is linked to better mental health in adulthood, including lower depressive and anxiety symptoms. It also aligns with evidence that team-based sports can provide social support and protective mental-health benefits that extend beyond the competitive years.
Practical ways parents can “right-size” expectations
Here are some research-informed, coach-approved adjustments you can start making this week:
Ask process questions, not just outcome questions. Shift from “Did you win?” to “What did you learn?” or “What felt better today than last time?” This reinforces a mastery mindset.
Check your “why” regularly. The UF study authors encourage parents to pause and ask what travel sports and elite teams are really doing for their family. If the honest answer is, “Mostly stressing everyone out,” it may be time to recalibrate.
Share your expectations openly with your child and coaches. Saying, “My biggest hope is that you learn to work hard and stay healthy; if opportunities come, great,” frees kids from feeling they are always auditioning for your approval.
Let coaches be the performance experts. As athletic development professionals, we are tracking metrics, progressions, and appropriate pathways. Your most powerful role is to be the emotionally safe base your child returns to after practices and meets.
Our commitment at Brooklyn Speed & Power is to match your healthy expectations with evidence-based training, honest feedback, and a culture that keeps kids growing not just in speed but in character and confidence.